Not like in the movies, but with hopes for a happy ending.

Things missing in my life right now:

• An apartment. We only have a few months left in the one we live in now, the one I love, the one I dream about a future in. Looking for another one feels rather depressing. 
• A job. Always thought I had quite a good CV, but realising more and more for every day that go by that my experience is worth nothing. That my interest on the work market is close to nil. 
• A cure for a specific disease that I would so want to be able to cure. 
• A best friend. The kind they always have in movies. The kind you can call up in the middle of the night, who's always there for you. The kind you want to share everything with, from joys to sadness, and with whom you would never hesitate to pick up the phone because you're worried do 'disturb them'. The kind where you can knock on the door unannounced and be welcomed with open arms. 
• A goal / orientation / bright future. Something to look forward to, something to plan for, something to live for...

There are other things of course, but these feel like the most important ones, the most sad/depressing/stressful ones. This last year my life was so much easier and the fall back to reality is still going on and hurting that much more than I had ever thought possible.

Not to say that it is all bad. I do have a lot of things to be happy for, such as:

• A love. The big love with a big L. Who is also my best friend and the only one who knows all that's going on in my life. A bit too much perhaps to shoulder for just one person though... 
• A great bunch of friends. Friends with whom to share a nice meal. Friends with whom to go to the gym. Friends with whom to party. Friends who jump on a plane to come and visit. Friends who cares in their way. Good friends, great friends even. 
• My health. Well, mostly at least. 
• An amazing year of travelling to remember, to warm me up, to put a smile on my face.

More good than bad perhaps. Just missing someone to talk to about the parts that are not so great right now. Someone who can take her/his time. Someone who doesn't get tired of my current down period but allows me to express my concerns, my worries, my feelings of belittlement. Someone who doesn't tell me off for not having done something as I stand under an ever higher reaching mountain of things 'to do'.

Oh well. I guess all is not like in the movies.